Unsolicited Advice

People generally understand they should not tell other people how to live their lives. Somehow, though, we lose sight of this when it comes to overweight people.

Since more than 60% of women and nearly three-quarters of American men are obese or overweight that may occur quite often.

Whenever you have the urge to comment on what someone is eating, ask yourself: Did they ask?

You will save the other person grief by avoiding a conversation that is completely unnecessary.

People think they are being helpful with their comments, but they probably don’t know how harmful or unhelpful some of that unwanted advice can be.

Unsolicited advice signals to people that you have already made a certain judgment about the way they look.

If someone asks for advice that’s awesome. Go for it and give them all your knowledge. But leave everyone else alone.

Never stop learning

One of the great things about life is that there is always an opportunity to learn more. There are always things you don’t know, that other people know, that may be buried in books or articles or online courses. 

Every day, every interaction we have, every time we read something, we have the chance to gain new knowledge. 

You learn new things, figure out something that doesn’t work for you, and now you want to change that thing.

It’s so easy to fall into the rut of “I know enough” because, hey, sometimes learning can be exhausting.  

Learning can be challenging, particularly if you have a hard time accepting you might be wrong or need to change what you’re doing.

By staying humble and modest you will be more aware of the opportunities to learn, more likely to try new things and more open to hearing other people’s’ views and opinions.

Stay positive

In life we have a choice between two roads, the positive road and the negative road. The positive road will lead to enhanced health, happiness and success. And the negative road will lead to misery, anger, and failure.

The power of positive thoughts makes a difference in my perspective and life. It helps me take on daily challenges, peruse my goals and create positive momentum in my life.

It also helps to overcome negativity, neutralize naysayers and conquer adversity. I do not get mad at the naysayers. Instead, I realize that without them I would not be as strong as I believe I am. Negative people make me more resilient, wiser, and better.

Being positive does not mean that my life is perfect. Sometimes when I try to share my passion, enthusiasm and authentic experience with others it invites the very pushback I am trying to avoid.

Positivity is like a boomerang. The more we put it out there, the more it comes back to us. This applies at home, at work and every relationship in my life.

Being positive does not guarantee that you will succeed. But being negative will guarantee you will not.

Hypocrisy

For a long time, I did not practice some of the weigh loss supporting behaviors that I write about and I gained weight. It came to the point that I regained 57 pounds. 

Annual physical test results showed that my sugar reached pre-diabetic level. The doctor said "let's repeat the test, but if it comes the same way I would have to indicate in your records that you are diabetic and treat you accordingly."

Unbelievable!!! I regained more than half of what I lost in 2010/2011. How could I be so stupid to let that happen? 

Well, it did happen. 

My main motivator - fear is working again  so I started to practice more of what I write about and the weight started to decrease. As of today, I lost 27 pounds and have 29 pounds to lose. 

I apologize that I continued to write about healthy behaviors, while I actually did not practice them diligently enough.

"Hypocrisy - behavior that contradicts what one claims to believe or feel" - Merriam-Webster dictionary.

Hypocrisy is the practice of engaging in the same behavior or activity for which one criticizes another or the practice of claiming to have moral standards or beliefs to which one's own behavior does not conform.

Start losing weight immediately

First, answer this question. “Why do I want to lose weight?” or if you are there already, “why do I have to lose weight?” Be brutally honest with yourself and write your answer down.

 

This is not for the whole world to see it. It is not going to Facebook or on the fridge door. It is for you only. Do not answer generally like “better health.” Be very specific.

 

You know your WHY and as painful as it may be, write it down now. Looking at you answer will help you realize that losing weight is more important to you than anything else.  That will help you with motivation. Say it a few times to get used to it.  You will be repeating this phrase when it gets difficult.

If you don’t know where to begin, try these uncomplicated tips and you are all but guaranteed to see the results you want. 

• Stop drinking soda and booze; drink water instead.
• Stop eating junk food.
• Avoid hunger. One key to losing weight is eating weight loss supporting foods that keep you full. Eat enough filling protein and fiber.  This will help you avoid hunger

Stop waiting for the right time to start losing weight; it never comes. There is no reason you can't begin your weight loss journey right here, right now.

Start working a developing a healthy eating plan. It will have to be the plan that will work for you. 

Your ultimate goal is to establish new eating habits that can be sustained for a lifetime. Losing weight is a lifestyle change, not something you do until you reach your goal.

There is never a “best moment” to start losing weight. The best time is NOW. If you take the first step tonight, you will have done the hardest thing that you will need to do - overcome inertia.

Don't wait for the "right time". Do it now. Take advantage of the motivation you're feeling now.

If you want to see how I did it, please visit ilostweightyoucantoo.com

Smarter

Eating smarter and making some powerful changes to my lifestyle resulted in losing 91 pounds in 2010 and 2011. 

The transformation I experienced led to a deep passion to help other people experience the same things that I had. 

So, today, I want to remind you of that. No matter what you have been through, no matter how things might have gone in the past, today can mark a new moment in your history. 

You are powerful beyond measure to affect change in your life, and the power of food is one of the greatest tools to help you. 

I hope that what I share on this blog and my obscure website will empower and inspire you to improve your food choices, not just because of the impact they have on your weight, but because the right foods can help make you the best version of yourself.

Welcome Back

I did not post for a long time. 

The first reason was that I regained some weigh and I realized that it would be hypocritical to write about weight loss while gaining weight. 

Then, I got COVID-19 and after recovering, I felt that I deserved to allow myself to eat the “good” food.  

It is not the first time that I moved away from the healthy weight that I worked so hard to achieve eleven years ago. In my previous mini weight gains since then, when the scale showed that I am 10 or 20 pounds above 170, I would go back to stricter compliance with the approach that had led me to the weigh lose before, and it would bring the weight back closer to the 170 pounds point. 

Why would I let myself gain weight? The answer is simple. My arrogance. I thought it wouldn’t be a big deal if I gain a few pounds, because I was a positive example of successful weight loss and I knew how to lose weight if needed. 

Now, however the difference between 170 pounds and my current weight it so big that I am ashamed to write it here. Fear, my strongest motivation for weight loss, is forcing me to take action. My blood test showed that I am very close to diabetes. 

So, the weight loss journey starts again. It actually already started six day ago and I am relieved that it is working. Today, the scale shows that my number is 3.4 pounds lower than what it was on March 2^nd. 

You Will Fall off the Wagon

It is not a question of if - it is a question how quickly can you get back on.

You will fall of the wagon because you are only human, but do you get back next morning, next Monday, or a year from now?

When it happened to me, I used this rationalization: Well, I blew it, I might as well just eat whatever I want.

Unfortunately, with this kind of thinking, small lapses can turn into long relapses.

When this happens, we can undo a lot of positive effects of our weight loss efforts. It is key to get back to your weigh loss supporting behaviors as soon as possible.

Do not wait until tomorrow morning, next Monday, or January 1.

There are many ways to avoid success in life

There are many ways to avoid success in life, but the most sure-fire just might be procrastination. Procrastination is simply the process of putting off something that seems difficult. The bigger the challenge, the more difficult it seems and the more likely you will be to put it off. 

Everyone uses procrastination at some point in their life. Procrastination is all about putting it off until later. It is a learned habit that we create for ourselves to avoid something we are not willing or ready to do. Procrastination allows you to read the health magazines and continue to be inspired by others’ weight loss success stories. Then you focus your thoughts on all the reasons why today is not a good day to start. 

You need to adopt a new approach; “do it today”. This is easier said than done but writing the reason why you want to lose weight can really help you to focus on achieving it. When you are procrastinating this means your “why” is not important enough. 

Why do humans often procrastinate and in particular, why do overweight individuals put things off and do not try to fix their weight problem “sooner than later”? What do you think?

Doing it differently

There's this wonderful sense of renewal with the New Year, and it gives us hope that we will turn things around. 

January 1 inspires most of us to dream big. For many the New Year means a fresh start. On January 1 we make all kinds of promises that “starting tomorrow, things are going to be different.”

And while making the resolution to lose weight is easy, keeping it, can be a challenge. New Years’ resolutions rarely bring the lasting change that you hope for.

The number one resolution - losing weight - makes sense considering the epidemic of obesity and related diseases, and our genuine desire to look and feel better.

Take advantage of these moments of clarity at the start of the New Year and take actions that would commit you to making good decisions in the future.

When you are decide that losing weight is more important than what you are giving up, then you are ready for action and you will likely succeed.

Temporary changes = temporary results

Anything that requires change can be difficult. Yet, in order to learn and grow and make progress, you have to change.

Recognize that change is difficult and move on to decide what is more important to you, losing weight or continue to eat only the food that you like (no change).

Losing weight and keeping it off is not very easy. But there are ways to make it easier. It is still going to be hard work. There are no shortcuts. No temporary changes will create permanent results. Which means you need to change your perspective. It means you never get to be “done.”

The bottom line is always the same: to lose weight, we must consume fewer calories than we burn. To keep it off, we must adopt permanent lifestyle changes. Making a lifetime commitment is essential.

Truth, or more precisely, an accurate understanding of reality is essential foundation for any good outcome. Radical transparency is invaluable for rapid learning and effective change.

To begin effective change, you must see the change as being a necessity. If the change is just “nice to have”, it won’t be sustainable because anything “nice to have” is also “ok not to have”. The stronger your desire for the change, the more effective the change will be.

Environment matters

Environment is the invisible hand that shapes human behavior. You don’t have to be a victim of your environment. You can also be an architect of it. 

Do your kitchen clean out. Double check what you have in the fridge and pantry. 

Get rid of the bad stuff - soda, chips, candy, processed and sugary baked goods - and stock up your fridge with healthy food instead. Food like fresh fruit and vegetables, and lean proteins. 

There is something tremendously empowering about physically throwing away the things you are choosing to remove from your life. 

Environment matters, so make sure the best choice is the most obvious one. 

Making a better decision is easy and natural when the cues for good habit are right in front of you.

How to make weight loss a priority

A priority is something we believe is more important than another thing. Why do we need to make something a priority? Priority helps us make daily choices that reflect our values.

If you look at every choice you have ever made in your life, you made those choices based on what was important and unimportant to you. What was more important versus what was less important. What you considered a high priority and what you considered a low priority. What you cared about and what you didn’t.

Our choices are based on what we want. Only when we want it we are truly motivated to go after it. What is it that we want? As practical as it might be, if it is important to us, then it is also motivating.

We love our food. We like our traditions. We have habits. We do not really want to change. When you determine that losing weight is more important than anything else, you will be able to make choices that lead to weigh loss and getting your life back.

Whatever it is that moves you, whatever it is that you so desperately want and desire, let it be the spark that fires you up to chase your weight loss goal and get your life back. Keep you “why” handy. What ever it is that moves you to take action, keep it fresh and in front of you as you make weight loss your priority #1.

It is like a cancer patient with one- or two-year life expectancy would do anything to live a little longer. When you faced with death, our comforts and wants and preferences do not seem as important as they once were.

Making weight loss a priority is the only way you will be able to get the permanent weight loss results you want!

It means working on your mindset every single day to ensure your thoughts are creating feelings that will drive actions to produce the results you want.

Are you currently living in a way that reflects weight loss as a top priority? 

Seeing clearly what needs to be done

One of the hardest things to do is to look objectively at yourself and assessing what type of change you need to make. You have to look the facts in the face before you can do anything about them.
If your answer is that you need to lose weight, take a piece of paper and write the answer.

Be brutally honest with yourself. You may hesitate at first. When I recommend this to individuals who talk to me about weight loss, they usually don’t want to write this staff down. They don’t want somebody to see it.

What I tell them if they were concerned to just tear it up and throw it away as soon as they were done. Keeping it isn’t the point. What matters is the act of writing itself, seeing your thoughts and fears if front of you and being honest about them. Only by getting out what is inside can we start to gain perspective. This is how change can take place. Not seeing clearly leads to inaction.

Change doesn’t happen at all if you don’t make the decision to do so. The only way positive change can come into your life is if you make it priority. How do you make it priority? I will write about it in my next post.

Stress is a normal part of life

Stress is known as a part of normal life and it is sometimes good for you. In small amounts, stress may maintain your energy and also improve your performance.

However, stress can cause negative effects for you. Trying to avoid dealing with stress might seem sensible, but it usually just makes things worse.

There are lots of practical, positive steps we can take to deal with stress. The common stress response is to eat comfort foods, foods that include high sugar, salt or fat foods such as chocolate, potato chips, soft drinks and snack foods.

While eating comfort food, when you are stressed out might actually help, it is not beneficial when you try to lose weight. You will get benefits in terms of stress reduction, but it will not support your weight loss efforts.

You can do plenty of things to de-stress. A good model of stress management is to do something about it and get beyond it. A bad model is to avoid it and let is accumulate.

Make sure most evenings include rituals that actively help you unwind.

Try something new

If what you are doing is not working, try something new. If you never take a step in the right direction, you will stay right where you are.

If you don’t know what to do, I can recommend that the first thing you need to do is to eat real food. Food that supports weight loss.

If you are not happy with your weight, you can chose to take control or you can choose to do nothing to change the situation.

You can take action or continue to use defense mechanism, like thinking that weight loss is too difficult to justify why you should not do anything to change your situation.

Making a conscious effort to eat real food that supports weight loss every time you decide what you eat is behavioral change that will make a big difference. That behavior change can help shift your attitude.

Planning is the key to success - lesson learned

There is a direct link between planning and achievement. Weight loss is no exception. 

To start my day off right I always eat breakfast and that sets me for success during the day.

Unfortunately, I finished all turkey breast and had nothing for breakfast this morning. For a moment I thought about having butter toast with jam. I knew that if I had this for breakfast, I would experience sugar carvings later. 

When a similar situation occurred in the past, I had six white toasts with jam. I just could not stop. Normally, I have one whole wheat toast with chicken or turkey breast.

While reaching for jam jar, I discovered that I had a can of  tuna fish. I put tuna on toasted 100% whole wheat bread and had good breakfast. Breakfast that supports my weight lose.

Survived difficult moment and learned another lesson to always pre-plan what I will eat and have food consistent with Eat Like Me approach available. 

Posting photo of my today’s breakfast.

Sugar dependence is real

If you’re like most Americans, you eat more sugar than is good for you. Sugar makes us hungry and fat because it is an effective agent that produces excess calories and stimulates further eating. People generally know that sugar isn't good, but they don't appreciate how powerfully negative it really is.

Sugar is the driving force behind the diabetes and obesity epidemics. In addition, when the body can’t manage the amount of sugar in the blood, the sugar begins to damage artery walls, increasing the risk for heart attack and stroke.

Why does sugar have such a powerful hold on us?

Consuming large amounts of added sugar activates the reward center and makes us want to eat that food again. Past memory of eating sweet things produces cues that induce the craving for more. Sugar can also change how you feel. When this happens, you can have increased cravings for sugar and feel a lack of control when around sugar. It resembles other abused substances because it is reinforcing.

While sugar is everywhere — in cookies and crackers, breads and pasta sauce — the single largest source in the American diet is sugary drinks.

Who should you believe

Years ago, when I posted on a popular website that losing weight was possible without exercise and that losing weight fast was good, it was treated as heresy. I was advised to read other posts before posting.

Another person posted that I did not know what I was talking about. A person with over 3000 posts in her profile suggested that my post should be ignored because I was trying to create a buzz. Even though I posted what I believed in, and more important, what worked for me, my message was not well received.

I understand that advocating losing weight without high-priced diet products, personal trainers and expensive gym memberships was not welcomed at that site. Many weight loss gurus like to emphasize long, steady weight loss. While they were coaching you through this weight loss, they are also likely draining your bank account in a long, slow fashion, too.

Widely popular assumption that in order to lose weight you must exercise has been the foundation of many weight-loss programs. The advice to exercise more to lose weight is simply not realistic. Some find it hard to accept but exercise isn't necessarily helping us lose weight. Even if you exercised every day, in order to achieve any noticeable weight reduction, you would have to do it for hours each day. Exercise is great for our physical health and state of mind, but it has a disappointingly small effect on weight loss.

While most weight loss "experts" still claim that losing weight quickly is not sustainable, study after study show that shedding weight fast leads to a greater weight loss and longer-term success of keeping it off.

Sustaining motivation

It takes determination to openly acknowledge our situation and keep striving to improve. Life is not easy. Life is not perfect. Perfection is not achievable, but improvement always is. I believe that in all circumstances we can choose. We can choose what we eat and what food we avoid.

Not being successful with weight loss attempts is not because we are undisciplined or lack willpower. Many give up their weight loss efforts not because they are “unmotivated” people, but because they don’t see results or/and use methods that include experiencing hunger. Hunger is the most significant problem with weight loss and a diet that results in hunger will never be successful. It is hard not to eat when you get hungry.

If you can change what you eat and how you eat, you will be able to lose weight. Initially changing your eating habits may cause some level of stress. But it can be done and there are ways to make it easier. I know it can be done because I lost weight without feeling hungry. Losing weight CAN be done without experiencing hunger.

What worked for me was seeing results. When I saw the numbers on the scale going down every single day, I got excited and wanted to stick with my method. Fast results kept me motivated. The more weight I lost, the more I realized how doable and relatively easy it was, and the more I wanted to share it with others.

You can lose weight - but it's up to you to take the simple daily actions that will make losing weight a habit. Seeing results and not feeling hungry will help.

Making smart choices when food shopping

Many people are interested in eating healthier, but with thousands of products lining grocery store shelves, choosing the right foods can be overwhelming.

What is “healthy”? What does “natural” mean? What are foods labels actually saying?  It can be confusing regardless of whether you shop in supermarkets or local grocery stores.

Buying, and of course eating, the right food is crucial part of my approach to weight loss.

Eat Like Me approach ensures weight loss and at the same time contributes toward healthy life style. I don’t offer any advice how to be more confident in the kitchen, because I don’t cook. The most complicated meal I can cook is scrambles eggs.

I buy and eat food that gives my body the nutrients it needs and helps me lose weight. I shop for food once a week on weekend. Shopping when I am not hungry or rushed for time helps. I plan what food I need to buy and stick to my shopping list.

The key to successful food buying when you try to lose weight is planning ahead.